Nonsense Random "Rant"

Eh, nothing really. Just felt like saying it. This site used to be so awesome. Way more awesome than me, really. No offense to anyone. Years ago, this thing is too awesome.

Not sure who to blame or what happened but it's like as time passes, things just keep getting worse. Or "boring". Or maybe it's just me. Or maybe I, myself is the reason. Eh, Hell, for those of you who have been here since the creation of the site, you know what I'm talking about.

Luna as the head, so entertaining to have around. Until I did "those" stuff and so blah blah, staff problems. She left.

Umbra. Formerly known as Nakaharu. Used to be my best friend. Hell of a guy. But now he's kinda boring... No offense. Like, he's just not the same guy.

Riley. Eh, never really was close with him. But he's a nice guy to have around the forum.

Rayquaza. Eh, always been a jerk to my eyes but I've heard good things about him.

Mystogan (Takashi). Used to be so active and "hey yo, I be boss here". Awesomeness and stuff. But now, like Umbra. It's like he's different now. No offense again. Maybe people really do mature and I just don't...

Nightmare. Ah, Hell of a talented graphic artist. Until I made up a story of the virus he sent me, he got pissed, trolled for a year. I'm a hypocrite. I'll make a big revelation now: I AM the bad guy. Not him. I made the virus story. I am the real troll.

Doragon. The only guy I'd ever die for. Seriously. A best friend, the best best friend I've ever had. Helped me through some rough times. But now we talk on Skype and I realize he's not the same anymore... Well, guess he's matured and I just can't keep up with time itself... I feel so left out.

Truth is. Years ago, Nightmare, Doragon, Luna, me were like Goddamn elite four. We're all bestfriends, so close to each other. Luna was like a big sister, Nightmare's like the boy next door I derp around with. Doragon's everybody's mentor. Until I don't know, I was such an immature wee lad back then that I spammed for ungodly reasons (immaturity and I have no idea yet how awesome this site and how big of a role this would play in my life).

Matt. Strict and stuff but just what this site needs, but I'm too much of a jerk so he left. I'm not saying I have a God complex and everybody left because of me but that's just how I see things. Or maybe I'm too self centered.

I don't know. This site, what it is in this present time, DOES NOT show me not even a ******* glimpse of what this used to be. It's like there's this big damn castle of glass until it slowly shattered to pieces and now it's all gone.

Things just don't seem to be the same anymore.

I know I shouldn't really be here now nor am I worthy of anyone's trust and friendship. Go ahead, call me the drama king. Like I give a ****. I want to get this off my chest and trust me when I say, I can't blame you for anything negative you gonna say.

Ian, Flame, my other friends right now, don't have an idea who the Hell I really am and what I did before. I tried to leave on my own because Hell, years ago I got banned a lot of times. I'm like an outlaw who squeezed himself to society even when the entire society hated him. Like, I begged for respect and forced you to trust me.

Now I'm choking on it. The real thing is, I said on Introductions I'm taking a "break". I was actually trying to leave forever. 'Cause nothing can take me out of this website, I'll just use the proxies and create another account if shit happens...

I feel like I just lost all my bestfriends and drove them away.

I know, I know, I shouldn't be here. But WHY? WHY CAN'T I JUST LEAVE? That's everyone's question. Why can't Shadow leave if he says that he really wants to and I so rightfully should? It's because I got too close to this site. What sucks is when you choke on yourself and your second family altogether. It's me vs. me. Cause of Shadow vs. Shadow fight? What Shadow did before.

My previous actions haunt me now. All I can say is sorry. Or whatever. Really, this is just utter useless bullshit and nonsense childish rant. Drama king. Attention seeker. I don't know either. I can't blame you either. If there's anyone that needs to be blamed for anything, it's me. At least, that's how I see it.

Pipebomb...

Why did I really kept spamming and trolling years ago? I was immature. Literally immature. 10 years old I think. With no idea of how things really do. I have no idea how awesome and big of a role this site would play in my life. It's like you make war with a random society for no reason and during a spy mission in that society, you find yourself attracted and welcomed to that society and now you're ****** up 'cause you're now good goddamn best friends with your 'enemy'. It sucks.

I don't know, really. **** me.

I feel such a liar and a master of deception. Avarice came here, truth is, you guys should've actually sided with her. She's on the "right" side of things. I'm actually the bad guy. She's actually the one you should be siding with. WHY DIDN'T YOU ALL SIDE WITH HER? Why did I fight her? Pride. I'm such an egomaniac that I think I will "suck" if I didn't fight. I'm waiting for someone to beat my ass. I'm asking for it. It's for the good anyway... Like, I can't control myself that I need someone else to fight me yet I try my best to fend them off. Or something like that. It's like two different people is inside me. I'm happy and I love to fight here because every single chance I get a fight, there's a chance that guy might just be the guy I'm looking for. Someone who can teach me a good lesson. Someone who can beat the crap out of me and think of a way to get rid of me on this site.

But you failed. And it sucks. No, I'm not subliminally being an arrogant jerk here. I'm speaking the truth. Somebody destroy me. Please.

I feel such a deceptive guy. Such a liar. I even manipulated Kare and the other staff to turn their backs against Avarice and when they MUST have joined forces. But no, they all failed. Kare and the other staff, next time, don't trust me. Really.

No, I didn't write all of this because of Avarice. I wrote this because of myself and for the good of everyone. Like, two Shadows are inside me trying to fend each other off yet helping each other at the same time. It's beyond words.

If only you guys can convince Avarice, Riley, Rayquaza, Nightmare, and Raimundo to all return here at once and beat my ass? And the staff helping them, maybe you guys might just drive me away from this site. It's what I want. Please. You're actually gonna help me and everyone if you do it. Flame and Ian, Reta and Kitty and all my friends, should really be fighting against me. Seriously... Yeah, this is a cry for help. For the good of everyone and for justice. Since I have not been punished for all the wicked things I've done from the past years...

You know what I'm talking about if you were here since the creation of the site. You know it's history. I'm the Magellan of this site. The Bowser fo this site. The Loki, The Vader, list goes on. Just really, get me the F off this site. Please. Justice must come at me. Tell you, it's gonna be hard. But it should be worth.

Then again it's always on the staff's decision. They're responsible of giving justice to those who should be stroke by it. I'm like a criminal who just can't get imprisoned even if I surrendered yet I wanna be locked in jail. That's like how I feel in this site... I surrender to the staff and ask them to ban me. Then, I get banned. I get sad in RL, because I miss this site and everyone yet I know I shouldn't go back. But I fail again and proxy, new account, cycle repeats.

Doragon is the only one who knows that something is going on. Something that should be taken seriously. So he taught me for years. But not it all came to me, I learned nothing from anyone. Not just Doragon, but everyone.

......what? was that not a sufficient response? Fine, I'll deal with this using words. How droll.

You're clearly self destructive. You don't need me to tell you that, you're there begging to be punished, that's the definition of self destructive. Still, I was like you when I was a young teenager, from the time I was 11 until about 15 I pulled the same kind of stunts you're talking about pulling now. I knew it was wrong, did it anyway even though I didn't enjoy it, just like you. Even posted threads like this from time to time. Only managed to stop after it cost me everything I held dear and I was left with no friends having forced away my first love. The desire to do that stuff crosses my mind from time to time even now, I just don't do it. It's about having a morale compass and willpower, about knowing what's right and wrong and then doing those things, and nobody can give you the ability to do that, you have to find them within yourself. You seem to be looking for someone to "defeat you", but the only person who can do that is you. Decide what you want and take it. Or be a drama queen, whatever. Either way, should make for a good show.

You could have just not responded...you're just starting things, now.

sorry to say it guys but leave him alone. He is a good friend and shadow man don't give up yet. You are a good guy and my friend.

I am totally respecting him. I'm not going to say anything about it.

"Avarice came here, truth is, you guys should've actually sided with her. She's on the "right" side of things. I'm actually the bad guy. She's actually the one you should be siding with. WHY DIDN'T YOU ALL SIDE WITH HER?" Bad guys don't admit their bad, good ones do. You always talking about the past, the past is the past, and you should try to leave it behind. If you dont like the way you act change it. You can do it. Honestly, im pretty much here the only one who cant here lol. So back to what you said, stay, it will do you good. One day you will realise that if everyone agrees your a friendly and respectable guy (listen to Ian, Jikumo, myself and many other), theres a big chance that you are. Now this is just how I see it. If anyone disagrees, fine. I did not post here to have other agree with me, im here to tell you what I think.

The staff made their decision concerning you, I was upset with it, and I resigned. End of story. Kevin and me made our decisions to quit, and the others have as well, but enjoy the company of these new generation members who do not remember how you stabbed us in the back. You may have changed, but justice still weeps at your presence.

what iz up shaddy pm me